Soft Skills Engineering

In this episode, Dave and Jamison answer these questions:


Dwill Ainghell asks,

During the golden era of software development, it was commonly stated that you should always negotiate job offers. The argument was that the company has invested significant time and resources into you as a candidate and there is always some wiggle room for negotiations. A popular article / podcast by Patrick McKenzie likened it to doing something slightly uncomfortable like “reciting poetry while simultaneously standing on one foot” with almost no downside. (https://www.complexsystemspodcast.com/episodes/how-to-negotiate-your-salary-package/)

Does this still hold true in today’s environment? I’m a SWE with 10 years of experience and I’ve been unemployed for close to a year. I’m expecting an offer from a large company and I fear that I will look like a fool trying to negotiate in my current position and the current job market dynamics. Even worse, I fear that they might retract the offer and give it to someone else. That being said, I don’t want to leave money on the table.

What’s the correct course of action in today’s environment?




Listener Stu says,

In episode 500, you said something to the effect of “working hard and doing a great job with the work you’ve been assigned is not the promotion track”. I’d love to hear you discuss what it does take to get promoted and how to do that.

In my job, we have a jira queue and engineers are tasked with taking from the top of the queue and executing work. There’s also an expectation to lead pre-defined projects (define the scope, write the tickets, and shepherd it along).

All of these projects have deadlines, so how do you recommend people get the defined work done, lead projects, and still find time to do whatever it is to get promoted?

Why is doing an excellent job not enough?

In this episode, Dave and Jamison answer these questions:


Hey Dave & Jamison,

Long time listener. Love the podcast.

I recently rejoined a remote team that I worked with in the past. I was super stoked to rejoin this team because they were collectively one of the most competent and technically excellent teams I’ve ever worked with. And they’re all genuinely nice people as well.

I left the team before AI coding had really caught on, but coming back to the team has been a huge shock to me. Almost everyone now exclusively writes code with AI. PR descriptions are all AI generated, and code review has become copy-pasting AI-generated comments into GitHub.

Being a remote team it was already hard to connect, but now it feels like almost all interactions are their AI assistant talking to my AI assistant.

I’m not anti-AI, and I get that writing code with AI can be much quicker. But I’m struggling with the loss of what made the team feel good to work on, specifically the craftsmanship, level of engagement, and the learning from eachother. The product itself is still high quality (even if the codebase is less-so), but the process itself is a lot less enjoyable now.

I don’t want to be the person who shows up after being away and immediately makes it everyone else’s problem that I miss the old way of doing things. But I’m having doubts if I want to be a part of this team.

Is this just what software engineering looks like in remote organisations now? And should I expect most teams are now operating like this?




Hi Jamison and Dave,

Love your podcast.

I was recently hired as a mid-level full-stack developer with the promise of leading a new squad. On day one, I discovered management scrapped the squad idea and promoted an existing developer to sole lead instead.

The team consists of this new lead, two 20-year VB6 veterans, and me. The codebase is lawless: direct DB access, fat controllers, 1-2K+ LOC classes everywhere (copy/pasted boilerplate) and severe Broken Access Control (OWASP #1) where authenticated users can extract anyone’s PII (full name, home address, phone number) via a simple email query string.

My coworkers rely heavily on generative AI but do not review the output. They constantly commit “AI slop” that barely functions and introduces endless bugs. I used to clean it up, but I recently realized they care so little about the codebase that no one even notices if I stop. Add in a “Senior Product Manager” whose entire UX background is a three-month internship, who invents customer requirements to defend her inconsistent designs.

I am already applying elsewhere.

My questions:

How do you handle a bait-and-switch of this magnitude?

When the team cares so little that no one notices if you stop cleaning up their AI-generated bugs, how do you stay sane and professionally sharp while riding out the clock?



Show Notes

https://tombedor.dev/human-attention-and-human-effort/

In this episode, Dave and Jamison answer these questions:


Hi D&J! Question from Sweden!

I’m a senior dev that have seen a lot of orgs without tech lead and/or staff engineer roles. I know some companies have them, but mostly newer more techy companies. Bigger older less techy companies usually have non-coding “architects”. Though that’s one title I have no good experience of, just neutral ones or worse :)

In particular I’ve been in many teams without a tech lead (all developers are equal, no tiebreaker vote). It’s often successful due to a leader and/or consensus emerging organically and peacefully. I loathe the failure modes however: consensus abuse through veto (we can’t move discussion forward because someone explicitly actively disagrees, a “keeping the meeting hostage” situation), disagreement on technical priorities and choices (lowest common denominator it is…) or that the team is bickering and bikeshedding during technical discussions.

Is this just a regional/cultural thing, or is it more about the type of org? Also would you say it’s to the detriment of these orgs to not have these “technical leadership hierarchies”?

Thanks!




Hey Dave and Jameson, love the show. I’m a Software Engineer at a major tech company. The org is non technical. I consider myself pretty well rounded. I consistently hit my sprint goals, crush my story points, and even put in weekend commits when needed as well as talk but I dont look for conversations into work im too far away involved in. My direct manager thinks my output is good. He told me to work on communication, but the work and my drive is good.

I have a relaxed demeanor in a high stress environment. Recently, I learned there are concerns that my “vibe” seems lazy and unengaged, and those concerns may have been shared with my skip-level manager. When my friend literally pulled up my raw metrics and story points to defend me, the friend had no answer, but just reiterated that it’s a “vibe thing.”

It feels like a political target has been placed on my back by business people who don’t understand my work but hold corporate influence. I told my manager and he says im doing fine, and people will say what they say. Everyone talks, etc, and just to focus on his feedback.

My question is: How do I fight a “vibe” complaint when the data says I’m crushing it? Should I cave and alter my lifestyle to play the corporate theater game, or do I double down on my metrics, lean on my manager, or dare them to try and figure out how valuable I am?

Thanks,
An Engineer Who Refuses to Look Bored

In this episode, Dave and Jamison answer these questions:


I have been at a small startup company for 5 years now. It’s a very small technical team, 4 devs and a tech lead that contributes code & architecture. I am getting a small raise this week for my 5 years but it’s a smaller raise than I was expecting. We’re an all remote team across the globe but I had a dev co worker in the same city as me just leave the company. This has put more pressure on me as I’m the only dev in the primary time zone we operate in, everyone else is east coast or opposite side of the world. With the added pressure and some forward comments from me in one on ones with my tech lead I expected much more that I’m being offered.

I think I’m supposed to quit my job but I’m terrified of that idea. This is my first job in the field and I love the work. The full stack startup experience is fun and I’ve learned so much, and I like my team a lot. I’ve never even applied to another position in tech yet, I got this one with the first application I sent out. That’s not even considering the current state of the field rapidly changing with AI and the general lack of jobs I am constantly hearing about in tech.

Is there a world where I should tell my boss I’m thinking about leaving? I’ve become an integral part of the team I think that would result in movement upwards, but that sounds so risky if I haven’t even put in an application anywhere else. Should I take the old quit your job advice even when the field is so shaky?

Thanks guys! And you reading the patreon names is the best part of my week too.




Hi there, I’m about 4 years into my career. I’m at my second job after leaving university. The first was at a firm under 50 employees and the current is at a firm with a global footprint and several thousand employees. Both are in Europe.

I moved to Europe on a work visa as a pathway to citizenship. I’ve never felt like either my past or current employer has taken advantage of my situation, but it’s important that I keep my job.

At both employers, I generally work one weekend day a week to meet expectations and keep on the promotion train. I’m not the only one; several of my colleagues do the same.

For now I have the time to work late, as my significant other is back home. Soon they’ll be moving over, however, and they have made clear they will not be okay with me going into work every Saturday.

Maybe I’m paranoid. Maybe the expectations at work aren’t clear. Maybe this is part of software. But basically, how do I get to a point where I can checkout on weekends and not feel guilty or like I’m falling behind?

Do I need to work longer weekdays? Do I need to sacrifice promotions? Do I need to get better at saying no?

In this episode, Dave and Jamison answer these questions:


Hey guys. This question comes all the way from New Zealand. Recently discovered your podcast about a month ago, and have been catching up with older episodes on morning walks ever since - you guys are awesome. Anyway - the question: Is it more beneficial to work for a company where the software itself is the product (SaaS etc) or does it no longer matter given the rise of the robots anyway? For context - I’ve been working for a telco/internet company for just over five year. Initially when I joined there was a huge roadmap of software to develop internally - things like customer facing portals, diagnostic tools, and of course internal tooling. However over the past couple of years, it has just been cost cutting and downsizing. Given that the company is not in the business of selling software, our department has been stripped to skeletal level just to ‘keep the lights on’. So, I’ve started applying for jobs at SaaS companies on the basis that even with AI, there will at least be a continuous roadmap to work on. Or, is this a case of ‘snakes in the greener grass’… or whatever the idiom is. Keen to hear your thoughts!




I’m an EM about 7 months into a role at a larger private software company. When I joined, the explicit expectation was 1 team (~8 direct reports). I’m happy to say my team has crushed it: award-winning product launch, clear monetization path, company IPO positioning. I made some bold headcount decisions, reduced spend, built the team’s trust back up, and things are now actually quite great. I’m generally a cynical person and so I don’t say that lightly :)

Last week my boss told me I’m taking on a second team, bringing me to 16 direct reports. When I asked if this was a promotion track, he said no. Apparently the expectation is now ALL EMs manage 2+ teams.

Problem: the internal HR leveling rubric still says 2+ teams is a Sr. EM expectation, which I didn’t apply for… precisely because I didn’t want it. When I pointed this out, he said “that’s out of date, and you’re behind your peers because you only have been running one team”. I did the job I was hired to do, did it well, and the goalposts moved without anyone telling me.

The kicker: the team I’m absorbing used to be run by a Sr. EM, who now has just one team!!

So a Sr. EM is shrinking scope while I’m handed their struggling team and told I’m behind. It wasn’t framed as a vote of confidence. It felt like a quiet reassignment.

Three questions: Am I being oversensitive to just poor communication (it’s possible the senior EM is being managed out and I shouldn’t use that as a benchmark)? Should I push for a comp increase since I’m now doing 2x the scope I was hired for? And how hard do I push back?

One constraint: I’m a couple months from planned medical leave and can’t afford to leave before then, so I have limited leverage.